Negativity is trending. It always has, really.  It is no surprise that you find interest in the heartbreaks, setbacks, and difficulties of others.  It is interesting.  You can relate to some of it.  You laugh at the ridiculous parts, and hope it never happens to you. Still, what gets through to your thought process will create a mental trend in how you see the world, and what you expect.

Breaking free from a negative trend, like that, is difficult.  Negativity is not easily shaken. When I started martial arts at age 26, it all came to light.  I had a warrior spirit.  I excelled enough to prove myself in class and earn black belts. I gained a more positive outlook. i was able to push negativity about myself aside.

Negativity of others is another trend that is almost out of control. I’ve always said that if you spent the same amount of time on improving yourself as you spend judging others, then over time a natural attrition process will separate the negative and the positive.  The positive will stand out because of the energy it builds.

Even in martial arts, there are politics and egos.  Years ago my view of this was limited.  As I’ve gained more momentum in the martial art culture, I’ve seen ego evolve and peak.  Personally, I would much rather read an inspiring story about a martial artist who has made a positive difference in the world, than read about the martial artist who is a fake or phony, or has no credentials.

If you focus on yourself,  you will make a bigger difference in the world than if you highlight the inadequacies of others.  If you take that negative energy and invest in yourself, whether by practicing more, writing about positive experiences, or teaching, you will be more effective in making the very change that you seek in others.

I learned a bit of a blended style through the years. I’m okay with that.  Some people want to criticize me, to make me feel like I’m less of a martial artist than others because of it.These martial artists have not developed their martial art mindset, and have closed minds. To them, learning anything that is not “true to tradition” is disqualified as a martial art, or even a disgrace. I never learned a martial art because I wanted tradition. My first criteria, in fact, was how close the school was to home, and the cost.  I wanted a place that could help my self-confidence, give me a solid martial art basis, get fit, and learn defense.  I accomplished all of my goals.

The time you spend criticizing others could be time spent on self-improvement.  You have your own issues on which to work and better yourself. Focus on a positive view of yourself, not a negative reflection of others. There is a story behind every person, and a reason for every reaction. Most of the time, you never know the behind the scenes explanation.

I can tell you this with certainty.  If the trend was positivity instead of negativity, there would still be many vibrant topics to discuss, and many exciting stories to tell.  Replace your negative direction with a positive one. Avoid the negative messages of others, gossip, or topics that center on criticizing others. Focus on yourself, and be an example. Others will follow and learn to be more positive, thanks to you.

The next time I check what’s happening in the world, I want to know about the good trends. If negativity is trending, I will have to skip being trendy this time around.

Andrea

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