When I was in college in the early 1980’s, I lived in an apartment during the summer months. On nice days, I would open the windows, feel a quiet breeze flow through, pull out my guitar and write a new song. I was alone, so it didn’t matter how loud or how well I sang. It was a good outlet for creativity and even frustration.  I would strum and sing and enjoy the moment of just being myself.  No one was around.  I had the place to myself for a while.

One day, someone knocked on my door. It was a man and a woman who lived in another apartment. They said, “We heard you singing. We have a band that plays at the local bar on the beach. We would love for you to stop by and sing some backup for us.”

It was an extraordinary moment. Sing? I’ve never put my lips against a microphone or stood on a stage. I never sang to an instrument other than my own guitar.  Honestly, I didn’t even know how to read music.  But…“yes, yes….I will” slipped out of my mouth as easily as my breath and that sealed the deal.

I met them at the bar a few times.  We practiced during a break. I already knew the song because it was very popular.  They told me to just sing as if I was in my apartment or singing to the radio in the car.  At some point during the night, while I was dancing or socializing out in the crowd, I would hear them call me up. They even introduced me!  It felt magical. I became friends with them over the summer and went to the beach with them or a couple of bars where we listened to music.  At the end of the summer, the band broke up.  It was something they had planned so I actually got to be a part of their final songs as a group.

Up on the stage, over to the microphone, a smile on my face, lost in the atmosphere, I joined the other woman in the band to harmonize and add the dimension to the song that they needed. It was amazing. Me! A non-singer! Not even sure I could carry a tune!  Someone else noticed something about me that I had never realized and that was incredible.

I learned then that I could do many things. I could finally stop underestimating myself. I could connect with new people who would have a lasting and wonderful impact on my life.  The moment taught me that…my life is a song.

My martial arts song

I’m sure you’ve heard it said that some parts of karate or martial arts are like a “dance.” They are movements that are choreographed or repetitive in nature. I see martial arts more like a song than a dance. There is a lot more involved than just the physical movements and techniques that make up a dance. The melody of my martial art is unique to me; a song only I hear.

In doing the kata, or any choreographed, unified martial art movements, it is up to the practitioner how to pace himself and where to explode in power. When practicing, there is a very original and personal manifestation of the art. The techniques combined with personal experience blend into the melody. There is rhythm, too and a unique beat demonstrated by each student,teacher and practitioner. There is a count and a fluidity that culminates in the kind of song that can only be sung by its originator.

It took me years to hear my martial art song and to sing it. It’s not something that flows naturally but must be sought out, practiced, and polished. It’s like singing note after note trying to find the right key. Finally, the song illuminates. It just builds beautifully and patiently.  Just like singing in the bar so many years ago, or after practicing karate for so long and learning the “song” it offered,  I knew that I could sing my own song and never worry that I was singing it wrong.

Your Song

You have a song to sing, too.

There’s a melody, a beat and a rhythm that is uniquely yours. Other songs may sound similar, but none is exactly the same. How and what you think make up part of the melody. What you say and where you go offer content. Emotions, highs and lows, and wonders and desires fill the chorus. It’s worthy to be backed by an orchestra and wonderful enough to be sung by the most famous singer. Yes, your song is as good as any other.

The missing piece might be your realization of the song or your failure to acknowledge it. Everything makes up the song.  When you have a bad day, you drown in doubt and anger. When you have a good day, you celebrate but only briefly. Never do you put all the pieces together, never do you hear the harmony that has just occurred when the good and bad mesh.  You might think that the “bad” means it’s not worthy to be in your song. It is. It is the most comprehensive and critical part of the song because it elicits emotion. It will inspire the tune and make things better in the long run.

In order to listen to your song, you must move away from your everyday life and your everyday you. You must see past the moment and into your soul. It’s waiting there. The chord, the instrument, the song that is playing. The essence of your life.

How do you get there? How do you find this core of song?

I can only rely on what I know and what works for me. To see my life as a song is to notice the details. The music. The flower. The star. The smell of morning. The ocean. The rain. The clouds. The way I feel when I awaken. Until I sang one day, and until I started to comprehend my martial art, I was not able to decipher these moments or even link them to my song-full life.

I’ve always been fascinated with details. I always wrote songs for my guitar that expressed love or love-lost. I’ve always written words that just flow into my mind with intricate descriptions and fanciful flair. It’s who I am.

The other part of my song is what I’ve learned over my lifetime. This makes up your song, too. Your schooling and your family, your career and your outlook roll into one melody. As your life progresses there are different levels of importance that rise like a high note. Who knows what you can belt out in any given moment, if given the chance.

Of all the tasks and activities in my life, martial arts gives me my greatest voice for personal expression. You must find your personal expression. Take time to embrace it.

When the band members walked up and knocked on my door so many years ago, I honestly didn’t expect it. I never thought I was even signing loudly enough that someone could hear my song, so clearly, right outside my window.

I’m here to knock on your door. I hear you. I am right outside your window.

I know that you are still holding back. There is something you want to do, to try, to figure out. There is no reason to wait. The stage is set. Pick your song. Don’t hold back. This baby step will give you the chance to combine all your notes and strengthen your melody.  You can do many things. Stop underestimating yourself.

Your life is a song. Be brave and sing it! If you need a back-up singer, I’m here, but I think you can do this all on your own.  To live life like a song is to Win at Life and that’s why your song is worth singing.

Andrea