I’ve been involved in the martial arts for a long time. In life, or in martial arts, I am still the same me, an over-achieving, positive, compassionate person who does what she can to make a difference.

I’m never going to claim that I’m an expert in anything, or that I’m better than anyone.  The key to my personal success has little to do with what others think or say about me, although a compliment is always nice.  Negative feedback never feels good, but I can deal with it.  There is only one way that I can continue trying to be a better person, better martial artist, or better instructor and that is to keep it real.

When I look back at my life, I see a lot of interesting things unfold. Or, at least, I can see why my life seems interesting to others. I’ve been a private investigator, a martial artist, a life coach, and an instructor.  I’ve overcome interesting personal obstacles. I have written a book (pending publication), write for magazines, a newspaper, and a blog. I smile in photos to keep the heaviness of life light. I play up my strengths and use them to my benefit.

If martial arts have taught me the importance of anything at all, it would be the importance of being me, and keeping it real.

I refuse to let my weaknesses overtake my strengths.  While never over-confident, I’ve learned to enhance my positive attributes through a healthy perspective. Martial arts have molded me.  I represent women, middle-agers, and martial artists who internalize what they have learned. I’m well-received because I have no airs and no preconceived notions.  It all keeps me real.

A long time ago, I was a martial art novice, a beginner.  I didn’t know anything.  Many beginners feel exposed and vulnerable because they have so much to learn and know so little.  They generally start off humble, because that is the only place with which they can identify at the time. For those who enter a school with arrogance, on the other hand, soon find that their unrealistic expectations and self-kudos destruct rather quickly. What it comes down to is either you can perform or demonstrate, or you cannot.

Don’t just take my word for it. Ask any reputable master why the arts are real.  They will probably delve deeply into history and how martial arts have remained true over tremendously long periods of time.  They will spout names of important ancestors, clans, and time frames when martial arts were essential and necessary for daily survival.  They will show how we apply martial arts today in a similar manner as in the past, although perhaps for different reasons, why sparring works, how self-defense saves, and how confidence builds through the arts.  I can’t think of any better, more real definition of the martial arts.

If you practice a martial art, I bet you have had many defining moments in your life:  a test, a board break, the first time you successfully memorized a series of movements. Other accomplishments might include when you earned your first belt, sparred, or realized that martial arts made an impact on your life.  Maybe you suddenly found yourself teaching, winning trophies, or excelling in some aspect of your practice.  Trust me, in all of these wonderful, life-building events there is nothing more exciting, nothing more evident, nothing more real.

Why is this important? Nothing is recognized as “real” until you open your eyes to it. Are martial arts real to you? Are they as real as the sun and the sky?  Is love real to you? Is it as tangible or more like a cloud or puff of air? Is the scent of a flower real? Or, is it a scent based on perception?  When you decide that something is real for you is when it becomes so.  Is fear real? Was it developed from an irrational thought? Is confidence real? Do you believe in yourself?

Martial arts can be the same.  They are only real if you trust them.  They are only real if they equally indulge your body, mind, and spirit. It does not matter if you are a beginner, or experienced.

Life, too, has a component of keeping it real, doesn’t it?  To live an engaging, incredible life, you must make it so. You have to learn to open up to the opportunities that come your way, and to actively seek your dreams and expectations.  Your life is not meant to be a box that closes only from the top, but a dynamic system that evolves.

When I started writing, I thought I would have no readers because I was focused on keeping it real.  I planned to expose the real me, the troubles and the triumphs, knowing it would help someone else pull through a difficult time. I knew my martial art mindset had to be a part of the equation as a way of explaining how positive thinking provides a different result than negative thinking.   I wasn’t sure it would work, but clearly I felt pulled in that direction and called to do it. After sharing steadily now for a couple of years, I only see my friendships and connections growing because I am resurrecting the art of keeping it real.

Today, stop what you are doing for just a moment.  Put down the phone, the tablet, the distractions.  Close your eyes. Envision yourself.  Who do you see?  What about your life?  Where are you headed? Maybe you need to make some changes based on your answers.

I give martial arts a lot of credit. After all, if not for martial arts I would not have the confidence to share my opinions and thoughts.  I would not have the courage to bare my soul. I would not continually seek new ways to expand my horizons so I can expand yours. I would not write every word with such tremendous gripping passion and focus.

I might be able to do all of this because I have wisdom, energy, strength, or power. Or, it might be because of something quite simple. I keep it real.

Andrea

 

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