There are some mornings when I wake up tired and in a bad mood.  I know, that’s a terrible way to start the day!  I have to remind myself that for many people I am a source of inspiration and encouragement.  That is how I start to turn the negativity around. I remember that I should feel no differently than I feel on a”good” day.

I know my trigger.  When I’m tired, I start to ride the border between happy and sad, good and bad. I have to recognize it in order to put it in its place. The recognition feels a little bit like a splash of cold water in the face or a slap on the hand. It takes a bit of a sting to bring me back around.  I’ve learned that the first thing in the morning is the perfect time to set the stage for the rest of the day.

How will I find positive tidbits throughout my day?  What are my plans? Who will I see?  Stretching and flexing my mental muscles first thing in the morning in preparation for the day ahead helps me to find  balance and strength.

Like me, as your day progresses, you may slip and wane in and out of a positive flow or direction.  Any small obstacle or barrier that creeps up is bound to throw you out of sync.  Unfortunately, there is no charger cord that you can just plug in to get charged up with positive vibes, although personally I would love that. I wish I didn’t have to take the time to drown out negativity.  If I could just plug myself in to the nearest positive charger, it would be so much simpler. Everything, even being positive, takes some effort.

The start of your day is just like the start of a martial arts class.  Students start class with a variety of feelings and expressions, some smiling, some yawning, some indifferent.  They’ve already experienced their day so it is a time to refresh.  In our classes, we take fifteen minutes at the beginning of class to stretch and warm up and then we  move into skills, followed by new lessons or techniques.  The warm up is a period to rejuvenate as well as stretch.  Looking out to the students, I see their quiet anxieties and their difficulties of their day written across their faces.  The time to reflect while stretching slowly pulls them out of any funk to where they need to be.

We normally start our stretch by sitting on the floor, leaning forward to touch toes.  It’s an easy metaphor for how we should embrace life, always reaching forward. For those who are only stretching half-hearted, I remind them that the stretch doesn’t work if you don’t reach as far as possible.  Another accurate metaphor for life.  If you don’t reach as far as you can for personal achievement, if you don’t give 100% effort or extend yourself fully, you will never reap the rewards.  Stretching on the dojo floor and in life seem to accomplish the same thing.

The hidden mysteries of martial arts are seen through the instructor’s eyes as the students unknowingly experience life lessons.

Next, we stand up.  We roll the shoulders, roll the head and neck area, and shrug the shoulders up and down. Then, we reach high, bend low, touch toes, and sway hips. The rhythm of the body to increase its fluidity through all of the stretching wakes up the senses.  Students who entered the dojo frowning or indifferent start to focus on their actions.  They forget the insignificant mental struggles that diluted their outlook only moments earlier and start to realize the power of their bodies. In preparation to learn their martial art, the body is warmed up and the mind is focused.  Basic stretches and warm-ups work wonders.

Basic stretches and warm ups in life also help you.  When you stretch your mind, it does not resist.  It will take as much good information as you want to feed it. How far you reach is up to you, but I can guarantee you that the further you stretch and reach in life,and the more you positively mold your mind, the better you will feel.  You will start to notice a difference in how you feel, in what direction you want to go, and in your outlook.

The decisions you make do not need to be monumental.  There are a many positive steps you can take when you need a boost.  Here are some sure ways to create a positive mindset and outlook, even when you are tired or grumpy:

• Close your eyes and take five deep breaths in and out.
• Write down five things that you really like about yourself.
• Identify three positive goals you will try to reach during the day (meet someone new, smile at everybody, not say a single negative word, do something creative).
• Reflect on one great, funny childhood memory.
• Set one important goal.
• Take some photographs of nature’s beauty.
• Take a walk or participate in a fun exercise class.
• Re-decorate or update your favorite space.
• Read some poetry

By redirecting your negative energy into a positive, you will feel like you can stretch forever, far and wide, and feel renewed.

Back to that martial arts class where life lessons happen almost every moment.

An instructor can teach you how to make the best of your attributes and improve your weaknesses.  He can demonstrate many different techniques and skills.  He can provide you with all sorts of awesome advice on how to protect yourself or improve; but, he cannot make you implement any of it.  He cannot force a directive if you don’t have the desire. He can walk you through it and watch you do it; but, if you don’t learn and develop it, he might as well be teaching you how to make pancakes, or rake the yard.  Any activity can be taught and learned that is mechanical in nature, step by step; except a martial art.  It doesn’t work that way.  Life doesn’t either.

Just going through the motions is a waste of time.

The application and implementation of every effective and successful plan takes awareness and vision.  That’s why it is so important for me,when I roll out of bed in the morning with the wrong mindset, to recognize my difficulty.  Then, and only then, can I open the door to manipulate my thoughts more positively. I have to see it for what it is.

The true test is when I look in the mirror and really see who is looking back at me.

In karate, I often make the children stand in front of the mirror when they practice because they have some difficulty understanding particular concepts if they cannot see them.  Getting both feet to face forward in a stance, is one example.  I can stand in front of them and tell them, and even physically move their feet, but they don’t understand what I’m trying to do until they can see it in the mirror. The mirror reflects all.  When they stand in front of it, their reflections shine for better or for worse.  They finally see what I’ve been trying to say.

Your reflection in the mirror does the same.  When you look, you finally can see how others see you. Who is staring back at you?  Is there happiness, hope, wonder, or anticipation in that face?  Or, is it tired, unaware, unsatisfied.  The mirror reveals all and if you feel down, or sad, or negative, and you look in the mirror, you will want to change what you see.  You will want to fix the stance; the stance of your life.

The responsibility I have to motivate, inspire, and encourage you, I also have for myself.  I want to live my life to its fullest, and not waste a single moment. I’ve felt disgruntled and disappointed.  I’ve wanted to kick a wall, or rip my hair out. On occasion, I may not be kind or a good listener or maybe even too tired to smile or be polite.  On most days, though, I’m going to live up to my calling. I’m going to stare myself down and decide if I’m doing the very best I can.  I’m going to follow my own advice and take a moment to do one thing that reminds me about my potential.  I’m going to check my reflection in the mirror.  I’m going to write a bunch of words and hope they land on your screen just when you need them.  Timing is everything.

Next time I warm up in class, I will try a long, mile-high stretch because that’s the kind of person I want to be.

Reaching for something better. Hoping for something more. Knowing that there’s a chance I can make a difference for you and for me.

I never realized that being a martial arts instructor would teach me so much more than what I teach others.  All of the physical aspects of what I share, the kicks and punches and blocks, the grabs and holds and escapes, the bag work and games, are so very important; yet, none reaches the importance of knowing that I can transcend the difficulties and insecurities that come my way if I recognize them and follow a positive path. And…if they knock me down, or knock me off my feet, I’ll just take that as another chance to stretch again.

Whether a martial art or life, the best rule of thumb is to stretch before you practice.

Andrea

 

 

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