During my journey as a writer, motivator, and martial artist, I meet some of the most incredible people. I could have a page just about all of those who have inspired, motivated, or encouraged me along the way. None do I take for granted. I know that people are placed in my life for a reason, and because of that, I am enriched. I love the magical beauty of different personalities, and how we each have a gift or talent to offer up, some in small ways, some in large, yet they are all equally important.
As a motivator, I often reflect on how we shouldn’t quit. There are many paths in front of us, many of which are thorny or riddled with obstacles, and others that give us good direction. If you have a goal, you should work toward it. It is okay if it changes, or IF you change your mind at some point. The important thing is to move forward, even if the direction eventually changes or divides.
Your life has meaning and purpose. Your job is to figure out, to the best of your ability, what the purpose and meaning are. That may mean that you need to change something about yourself, or quit doing that which is not helping you accomplish your goal. I never promote quitting difficult challenges, or that from which you will learn a great life lesson. But, for those who have addictions, bad habits, or other self-imposed limitations, today is the day when you SHOULD quit.
Some of our hidden talents are in the ability to turn troubles to triumph. In fact, these types of events mold us into who we are. Overcoming what seems a huge burden or obstacle is exactly what helps us to realize our internal power and our personal greatness. When we look back at the situation later, we quickly realize that we could never be who we are today, if not for pushing through it.
Yes, sometimes, you HAVE to quit, if quitting means you are discarding that which holds you back. While I don’t condone quitting just because a task seems to monumental, or because life throws you a curve ball, I do encourage quitting that which stops you from becoming the person you want to be.
- Working from a white belt in martial arts to the next level? Don’t quit.
- Facing a challenge that has stopped you from seeking your potential? Don’t quit.
- Making a change that will benefit those around you and make our world better? Don’t Quit.
So, when should you quit?
Recently I spoke to a friend, who shared his personal struggle that he finally quit, in order to move ahead. His story may not be much unlike many others who have underlying addictions. To see how the struggle is now reflected in his art and music, is truly a gift. Loosely based on his story, I’d like to share why quitting his addictive behavior helped him take his life back.
He told me that almost two years ago, he decided to quit drinking alcohol and take over his life again, after a lot of years of bridge burning, wallowing in self-pity and self medication. It scared him, but he knew he needed to get help to get better. After rehab, he lost 30 lbs and got into the best shape of his life. He learned that a cynical mind is different from an informed one.
Today, like all of us, he still has ups and downs, but he governs them a lot better. He learned more about spirituality in recovery than he did in any religious groups he followed. He says, “Being at peace and not in pieces is a wonderful blessing.”
As a martial artist, I have learned to face my own demons, and if you practice martial arts, I bet you have, too. That is one of the unspoken benefits of learning a martial art, how to face the internal demons and overcome. For instance, my younger years were not the most confident of my life. Martial arts helped me accept who I am and not focus on weaknesses, but on strengths. My fears of speaking in public were overcome. My insecurities that I was not as good as others were overcome, too. I faced them using the tools that martial arts offered. I was able to quit these uneventful behaviors and create new ones in their place. That is when I learned that “quitting” has its worthwhile moments.
Today, as you take a moment to examine who you are, it might be a good time to think about what you should quit, and what has been holding you back. If I had not overcome my fears, I wonder who I would be today. Still, every day, a fear or negativity creeps in. I have the mental arsenal now that I need to fight it back. You have the tools, as well, and they are mindset and positivity. Quit the negativity, and replace it with these.
We all have hidden thoughts and truths that get in our way, and are worthy of quitting. Focus on what is good and try to eliminate negativity as much as possible. While not all of us has to face and eliminate an addictive behavior, like my friend, there is definitely a common thread that I truly believe weaves through all of our hearts, and that is to be at peace, and not in pieces.
xoxo
Andrea
My new book, The Martial Arts Woman, is now available. Purchase through my e-commerce store: http://themartialartswoman.storenvy.com/ or on Amazon!
The Martial Arts Woman shares the stories and insights of more than twenty-five women in the martial arts, and how they apply martial arts to their lives. Unlike most other martial art books, the reader will catch a glimpse into the brave and empowered woman who dares to be all that she can be. Many of these women had to overcome great societal or personal challenges to break into the men’s world of martial arts. This book will motivate and inspire you to go after your goals in life and to fight through every challenge and defeat every obstacle. The Martial Arts Woman will open your eyes to the power of the human spirit and the martial art mindset that dwells in each of us!
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Andrea F. Harkins is a writer, motivator, life coach, martial artist, and public speaker. Her book, The Martial Arts Woman, is now available at themartialartswoman.storenvy.com or on Amazon!
Andrea is Internationally known for her positivity through martial arts efforts and outreach, and her writing. She is currently a columnist for Martial Arts Illustrated UK, The Martial Arts Guardian (UK), the World Martial Arts Magazine, MASUCCESS, Conflict Manager, Martial Arts Business (Australia), The Parrish Village News, and her blog, The Martial Arts Woman. Contact her through this website’s CONTACT ME page for information on public speaking, autographs, and life coaching.
You have hit the nail on the head (again). As you wrote about times when you should quit, I reflected on my own life. About 25 years ago I was going through a rough patch, professionally, financially and personally. I went through a couple forced job changes, got into a mortgage too early, and most importantly, my marriage was falling apart. I’d also had to put down my dog and then I lost my grandmother, both events adding to the dark cloud that had begun shadowing my life. Changes had to be made. I quit the dead-end job and got one with an employer I knew and trusted. My finances started to stabilize. I divorced my wife and met the woman who would become my next (and final) bride. Most importantly, I rediscovered my faith. A large part of this rebuilding was starting martial arts training. Needless to say, things are much better now, because I knew what to quit and when.
Yes, you found the key to living the life you want to live. What a great example, and a great insight as well. Thank you, David.
As always, great wisdom revealed for those who are conscious! 🙂 I was watching a film a while back, and a character made a statement that just stuck in my head: “You must forget the past or it will kill you.” It was a strong statement, but it made sense. We can’t live if we’re stuck in what was. And the beauty of the martial arts is that we are shown how to cope and live with what is, versus what we want to be. Take care, my friend and Never Quit helping us Win at Life!
Knowing how to cope is the biggest gain ever! Always move forward!
Ossu, and thank you! It’s a good time of year for this post – people are making New Year’s resolutions 🙂
Thanks Joelle! I have a few of my own to make, for sure! Merry Christmas.